Real Men Don’t Cry (or do they)?

Tessa Burns MartinStress

Is it true? ‘Real men’ don’t cry? How sad – maybe they should.

There is often a negative stigma surrounding men crying.
Some men are afraid to cry and be classified as being ‘weak’, ‘unmanly’, or a ‘wuss’.

Maybe it’s because some people feel uncomfortable being around a crying man?
I remember one lady telling me, “Ugh – I don’t know what to do when my husband cries.
He makes me so uncomfortable.”

Well – I’m here to tell you – real men do cry.
Some of toughest, meanest, most ‘manly’ men on earth, cry.
And I’m glad they do.

The benefits of crying are pretty incredible:

Physically – crying helps reduce stress levels in the body, lower blood pressure, release toxins, and help protect our eyes.

Emotionally – crying helps release the build-up of negative feelings that can lead to anger, frustration, and depression.

So – if you had a rough day, stressed out, or just need an ‘emotional release’ – what’s a man to do?


Come on – let it ALL out.

Ok – so it’s not that easy. I get it.

If you are having problems letting it flow – here are some helpful tips on ‘healthy crying’:

  1. Find a quiet, comfortable, and safe place to cry. (Crying while operating heavy machinery or in the process of arresting someone is not recommended!)
  2. If you’re feeling overwhelmed or stressed out and don’t know how to start crying – watch a sad movie, listen to a sad song, or think of a sad thought. (Let me know if you need a list of sad songs or movies – I’ve got some great titles.)
  3. Don’t worry if the tears don’t start flowing right away. The act of acknowledging and embracing the sadness you feel is also quite beneficial.
  4. Don’t be shy – cry with someone. If you don’t want to cry alone, there’s nothing wrong with crying with a friend, family member, or with others in a movie theatre. As a dog owner, I cried in a movie theatre watching Marley and Me (2008). So did dozens of others – including the man next to me!
  5. After a good cry, always end on a positive note. Crying is a great way to re-set the mind, body, and emotions. The perfect way to do that is re-fill ourselves with positive thoughts, a happy song from our favorite artist, or look around and appreciate your surroundings.

For those ‘uncomfortable’ being with someone who’s crying – just relax.
Provide them with a warm hug, a little empathy, and a smile.
They just want you to be there for them.

Still not convinced that crying is ‘manly’ enough for you or makes you ‘weak’ or a ‘wuss’?

Tell that to World Heavyweight Boxing Champion – ‘Iron’ Mike Tyson.

He’s cried a few times on TV – in front of millions of people.

Now that takes a ‘real man’!

For other helpful tips to reduce stress in your life, please contact our office and speak to one of our therapists.

Alex Guidotti, MC